


About a Baby Moose

by cajunquandary



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Break My Heart, F/M, Ficlet, Miscarriage, death of uknown character, poor sammy, short fic, super sad sam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-15
Updated: 2020-10-15
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:26:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 541
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27025018
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cajunquandary/pseuds/cajunquandary
Summary: The Winchester legacy (or lack thereof) has been on the boys’ mind lately. Sam isn’t as concerned since one of his rare one night stands was pregnant and due in only two more months with a baby moose, and he can’t wait to tell Dean.
Relationships: Sam x unknown female character
Kudos: 1





	About a Baby Moose

**Author's Note:**

> Takes place after 12x18. A combo fic from two requests. @emptywithout asked for a super sad Sammy: “Sam lumbered slowly into the library, dragging his feet. He plopped into a chair and stared at the floor. All the energy had left his body. He had nothing left to give. He felt empty of all emotion.” And @abbessolute suggested stillborn (but this one morphed into miscarriage.) On a side note, something personal. My mom and I both have Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. She has had stillborn twins and four other miscarriages. My sister and I were both complicated births as well. If you have suffered these things, too, I am always available to talk (about anything.) You are not alone <3

Sam looked away from the laptop screen, rubbing his eyes hard with the back of his hand. He was exhausted but too nervous and excited to sleep. After he and Dean spoke about their legacies the other night, he’d hardly been able to contain the news that one of his rare one night stands (this particular lady happened to be graduating with a doctorate in Medicine from an esteemed University) was pregnant and due in only two more months. He grinned wide, just thinking about little baby feet and tiny clothes, baseball games and school plays. And how great of an uncle Dean would be—he was a natural with children. Sam had already planned how to keep them safe, away from the men of letters, away from angels and demons and everything else, and Cas was going to help him with the warding. Sam even considered making a deal with Crowley to ensure his new family’s safety.

He was waiting on the call to get the okay from her with permission to tell Dean and start implementing his plans. As he daydreamed of big hazel eyes and worried over what kind of diapers he would use, his phone vibrated. His heart jumped into his throat as her name and photo showed on the screen. He answered, nearly falling out of his swivel chair.

The call wasn’t as expected. It was a doctor on the other end, sobbing in the background. When he heard the news that the baby didn’t make it, he sat frozen until the line went dead. Sitting for a few more minutes in that position, phone to his ear and eyes empty of all light, the weight of knowing he was once again the end of his line hit him like a ton of bricks. He was no longer a father. He was no longer allowed to think about report cards or school dances, scraped knees or kindergarten crushes. What made him think he deserved those things anyway? What had made him think those things could ever exist for a hunter? He was a fool.

Dean had come in at some point, taking the phone from Sam’s hand. Sam looked at his brother, mouth moving but still unable to speak. He was utterly locked inside his head. After some coaxing from Dean, the men shuffled from the war room to the library for drinks. That always loosened Sammy up.

Sam wasn’t just crushed for himself and the woman he still admired, but also for Dean. Dean was going to be an Uncle. He was going to be there for the kid, be the cool adult that always let the kid get away with shenanigans and be the person the kid could go to for anything, since Dean wouldn’t be mean Mom or Dad. The way Dean had spoken about wanting to be remembered, about living on even when they were gone… that is perhaps what crushed Sam the most about the loss.

Sam lumbered slowly into the library, dragging his feet. He plopped into a chair and stared at the floor. All the energy had left his body. He had nothing left to give. He felt empty of all emotion.

How could he ever tell Dean, now?


End file.
